7 Things That Helped Me Heal From Childhood Trauma

1. Healthy Space and Boundaries

Usually, we need some time and space away from the pain to best process it.

I didn’t really think about this part of my healing until Christina Taylor brought it up in episode 138 Raised & Redeemed Podcast. Probably because I was 13 when I placed my first restraining order and my abuser was in prison for the next 5 years, giving me plenty of time and space to process. I then moved 4 hours away to college, and then across the country to start a new life far from the pain.

I would of course have to learn in later years that wherever you go, there you are, but that would be a next layer deeper.

2. Studying Psychology

While in college I studied psychology and learned that hurt people hurt people. I also learned how impacted we are by our own childhood development, and began to have compassion for my parents and the love voids they must have had to hurt our family the way they did. Empathy was a big step to healing.

3. Encountering the Spirit Realm

When I was 22 I encountered the spirit realm, a demon in particular. This encounter shook me to my core and provoked a radical change in my life. It was then I began to understand the spiritual war raging around us, and this fight against good and evil for each of our souls. I realized my parents were losing that war, only deepening my compassion for the darkened state of their souls.

They listened to the voices of demons. They were bound by their sins to demons.

I started praying for them and their salvation.

4. Embracing God as My Father

Realizing demons were real, made me realize that the Bible was true, and Christ was real. I now had a Father in heaven to parent me, guide me, and love me in ways I never had before. For the first time in my life, I knew I wasn’t alone, and I knew that I was loved.

In this, I developed a new mindset about my pain—most importantly, that there was a purpose in it.

5. Verbally Processing My Pain

I did lots of therapy, group therapy, support groups, and the like, getting to verbalize my pain out loud. Each time I told the story, it held less power over me. I also started the Raised and Redeemed Podcast, where I got to share how God was redeeming me from my pain and weaving His beautiful purposes for my life through it.

This also allowed me to connect with others who had lived through similar pains, making me feel less alone in my healing journey.

6. Coming to the Church

When I realized the Orthodox Church was where I could practice the fullness of Christianity, I came home. Here I gained a spiritual family. A spiritual father. The Theotokos as my mother. Siblings in the faith. Saints in heaven with similar stories who were praying for me. And a new profound understanding of salvation and healing.

Orthodoxy teaches a theology of healing, in that the more we draw towards Christ through His Church, the more we heal. Through the Sacraments, liturgical living, and learning to love Christ more, we too can be healed like the Saints were. I’m only beginning to embark on this journey.

7. Starting a Family of My Own

Saint John Climacus says there are two paths to our salvation: 1) monasticism and 2) marriage. I chose the latter, and through my Orthodox family life, I will continue my ascent towards heaven.

Through my husband, I am learning the sacrificial love of Christ. Through my mother-in-law, I am learning motherly love. Through my daughter, I am learning the overwhelming love God must feel for each of us. In co-leading a family, I am learning to trust God and His provision in every season. And so much more. All of these things are continuing to heal me.

Glory to God.